A Confession

Hahaha I'm preparing biology and suddenly turn out in front of my computer.
NOOO I CAN'T CONCENTRATE ON THINGS TOO LONG. It's too hard for me TT
I have to keep moving and walking around so that I feel tired and go to sleep hahahaha instead of study.
I'm the one who always keep confusing myself. There's no need to worry about, if you can, you can. If you can't, then there should be no reason for worrying something anymore, right?
So, if you are worrying about your exams, relax bro! Do it as usual and enjoy it, maybe like... sleeping during exams? hahahaha
If you have the problem same with me-so hard to focus something too long, then you'll understand why I always sleep whatever and whenever. CHILL lah.

I have something to tell my friends. I DON'T THINK it is a best time to discuss abt it plus I'm getting tired to talk again and again.
Anyway. I think you can guess it or think abt it yourself?
For the chit-chat last night, I'm very sorry for not considering abt your feelings. But the feelings in Langkawi was worse than yours maybe hundreds or thousands times.
Something must be playing in your thoughts, ' Why are you keep talking this topic all the times? Don't you feel annoy? '
Yea, I know. Even I'm controlling myself not to mention it, but honestly, I won't forget those feelings. It's my prob, same like you. It's our problems when we feel uncomfortable to someone.
Please don't feel sorry for me. I'll consider for ten times whether should I or not to hang out with you ( long journey ) next time. I'm very sorry abt it because I can't bear the disapointment for watching you with your boyfie and I was alone in Langkawi. No handphone to cover my uneasiness, no one to talk to. Watching you guys walked in pairs and I was like ... ' you're asking me out and now I'm enjoying with myself? WTF is this? '
Okay, this is my opinion, maybe next time, if you're going to spend your time with your boyfie, just don't call me out. THAT'S ALL.
I don't like to see couples since I came back from Langkawi. You guys would never understand how was my feelings at that time.
I was blaming myself so much for promise you guys I'm coming with you but doing nothing. I used to cover my real feelings by doing all the stupid things. IKR, you won't realize it.
What I was thinking and expecting before going to LANGKAWI was we were going to chit-chat in the night, drinking maybe beers and I had so many things about John to tell you that time and I was so heart broken. I still can remember that bitch face that I was showing up throughout the trip ( hoping he'll reply me when he was free). And someone keep putting me down, saying a lot of no good words to me.
All of my expectations were just my expectation. You guys walked with boyfie, leaving me with CSC, sitting on the beach which I was planning all of us should be enjoying our girls talk after comfortable showers.
CHILL LAH. It's over and doesn't matter anymore. Just don't think I'm a weird-thinking person, that's enough. HAHA
Just wanna let you know, having a group of friends do not mean all of us have the same opinions and thoughts. So, friends are like matching-pairs-game. If you like his/her character, don't lose the chance to become good friends! If you are not, MAY THE GOD BLESS YOU.
Again, sorry for neglecting your feelings. IKR. But have you guys ever thinking what was my feelings that time?

22 / 8 / 2015

考试时期 又在放纵自己上网来更新部落。怎么办呢每次都选择逃避宁愿做点家务就是不愿意读书。
本来是有好多的话想要感慨一番 没办法 只要自己独处就会特别感性特别没有安全感。
可是我不想说了哈哈 只是想要上来说说最近的情况我就知道你们很想知道我过得好不好哈哈哈
几米说：别为我忧伤，我有我的美丽，它正要开放。嘻
有时候我挺纳闷的 觉得身边的人拥有我想拥有的幸福和快乐。
我也好想让自己过得幸福 所以我努力改变了自己的想法。有什么好羡慕呢？每个人也都在努力过上自己想要的生活不是吗？
想要让自己开心第一手册：学会感恩。
ANYWAY 我相信自己真的有很努力的想要让自己过得很好！
今天天气挺不错的  唔。 努力读书然后休息一会儿吧！加油

8 / 8 / 2015

Happy 8 / 8 / 2015 !
Haha looking back my previous posts  AGAIN and AGAIN !
Mom said, nothing is worthless. Every drops of tears will let you learn something that are valuables in life.
So, every posts that I've posted, I become more and more mature, resistible, stronger and powerful ! HAHAHAHA YUCK
I'm quite confuse with myself. I feel energetic and positive when I'm alone.
But if you ask me out and I hang out with a group of friends, my depression, tension, frustration and bla bla bla anything negative emotions will overwhelm me.
So I keep grumbling and complaining. I don't act like that when I'm alone and I don't know why.
If you want to be confident, you have to feel comfortable when you're alone.
LONELINESS doesn't mean when you're alone. It always happen especially when you're with friends and you feel you don't belong to the group.
IKR. So, I'm trying to conquer my negative feelings though it's sooo hard.
Keep learning in every moment. Be well-prepared and improving yourself no matter how hard the life is.
YOU DESERVE BETTER, VELENNA TEOH.
LET US TRY TO MAKE THE WORLD MORE BEAUTIFUL.

7 / 8 / 2015

Hi, it's been awhile. You guys still waiting for my post? LOL
I'm recovering but still need some timeeee, but it's okay because I have a new motivation now.
Don't worry about me though I keep complaining haha.
Just because someone failed to see your worth, doesn't mean you are worth any less.
I want you to feel the happiness when you're with me. But IDK whether you guys feel happy or not when you stay with me.
HAHA forget it. Tell you a good news. I found a way to let me temporarily to forget something bad and yet I feel so comfortable even when I'm alone.
See? When you don't focus on the bad things, happiness finds you. I'm quite enjoy the time when I'm be with myself.
Science is so IMPRESSIVE. When you don't understand deeply, you won't realize how amazing it is.

Most of the time I don't really understand myself. WHAT DO I WANT?

Everyone is your life-teacher. They teach you lessons that you can't learn in textbook.
I'm quite grateful for all the things either it's happy or sad that I've been through. I love you guys.
It's a nice weather today. Why don't you call out your buddies and go for a jog?
#APPRECIATETHETIMEWEAREHAVINGNOW
#BEPOSITIVEANDENJOYTHEMOMENTYOU'REHAVINGNOW